Fighting to be loved
by ReginaMills96
Summary: This is basically what happened between Harry and Tally but with Lara and her daughter. With a little twist please read and review. It's better then it sounds.
1. Chapter 1

(Megan's POV)

I stood rubbing a dish dry in the kitchen, the café was dead and I had nothing left to do. We had no customers and my mind was elsewhere. I'd been looking forward to this night all week. Me and mum we're going out for pizza. I missed the fun we use to have. You'd think being the daughter of Holby's number one registrar would be a good thing right? Wrong. Being Megan Stone wasn't easy at all. Especially when your mother forgot you existed. My dad was Patrick Spiller and up until I was 7 life was good. But, after dad died things just got worse. I was 16 now and I'd just left school, mum and I had talked about my A levels for years. I wanted to be a doctor just like her and my dad.

Things changed when she met him…Simon Kaminski. He was a tool and unfortunately my mum's new boyfriend. I hated him, he was such a jackass. I'd been living with my best friend. 17 year old, Tally Harper. Her dad Harry was one of my mum's close colleagues but, she wouldn't even listen to him. Tonight was supposed to be about building bridges between my mum and me. Tally was working today anyway. I finally finished my shift and made my way to the hospital. I went to reception to wait for mum and had a chat with Tally.

"Hey Megs, what are you doing here?" Tally asked

"I'm going out with mum remember?" I replied

"Oh yeah, well text me when you're on your way home okay?"

"Yeah sure. Do you know where she is?"

Lara came through reception walking straight past me.

"Mum?" I called

"Not now Megan!" she called back

The story of my life. 'Not now Megan!' That's what she always said. Well not this time… I ran after her, grabbing her arm and forcing her to stop and talk to me.

"Hey! We had plans" I told her

"What plans?" Lara asked

"You're goings out with him aren't you?"

"Simon. His name is Simon and yes. Megan-"

"Save it" I said walking off

I went back to the reception desk. Lara had blown it this time.

"What time does your shift finish?" I asked Tally

"In about half an hour" she replied

"Okay what can I do to help?"

Simon was Tally's ex and therefore she hated the situation just as much as me. I waited in reception for Tally's shift to end and when it did I was glad to get out of there. We passed Lara's car on the way out and I couldn't resist it. I pulled out my keys and ran it along the side a couple of times.

"She's going to kill you!" Tally said pulling me away

"So…" I said

"Look lets go home. Get changed and we'll go out. I need a girls night out" Tally suggested

"Nice idea but I'm skint until Friday"

"So? We'll use dad's credit card. It's not like he'll notice" she said

"Okay then" I gave in

We went home, changed and went straight back out so that Harry didn't see us. We went from club to club, dancing our way through clubs. We didn't need to use the credit card because we just flirted our way through the bar staff to get free drinks. When we went back home, we were both so drunk we could barely stand. Harry went mental when we arrived home around 3am and when I threw up everywhere it didn't put him in a better mood either.

I woke up in the morning with a pounding head. Tally and I were both laid in Tally's bed. I sat up and Tally woke up too.

"What happened?" I asked

"I have no idea" Tally replied

I stood up going downstairs with Tally. Harry wasn't impressed. We sat down at the table and Harry stuck a cup of coffee in front of each of us.

"Look at the state of you" A voice came from behind me.

"Good morning _Lara_" I said

"Get dressed" Lara said

"No. Who do you think you are my mother?"

I took a sip of my coffee.

"Come on you have a car to re-spray"

"In your dreams. Go home to Spazminski and pretend I don't exist"

Lara gave up and left eventually.

"Tally go and get showered. I want to speak to Megan" Harry said

Tally groaned and stumbled up the stairs.

"Megan you know you can stay here as long as you like? But don't you think you should give Lara a chance"

"She pretends I don't exist. So no" I said


	2. Chapter 2

(Tally's POV)

I was at work, it wasn't very busy but then again the drunks didn't come in until kick out time. Dad was working too which meant Megan was home alone. She'd said some strange things last night, she was talking about scaring Lara. I didn't know what she meant maybe it was the drink talking? I had my phone on the desk. I wouldn't normally have it there but I was so bored. My phone beeped letting me know I had a message. I picked it up and opened the message.

_'Thanks for letting me stay at yours but I need to get away from Holby and away from them. I'm going to stay with my dad...Love you M xxx'_

Her dad? But Patrick was dead. Maybe she was still drunk or hallucinating? I thought I'd better tell someone just incase.

(Megan's POV)

I stood in front of the mirror, I didn't even recognise the girl staring back at me. I was 16, I had my whole life ahead of me. But I didn't feel like it. I felt like I was buried and I was screaming for help but no one heard me. Lara didn't want me and I couldn't stay with Tally forever. I held the brown glass bottle in my hand and started to scrape off the label with my fingernail. If and it was a big if...if they found me, they wouldn't be able to save me unless they knew what I'd taken.

I went downstairs and searched for any form of alcohol that I could find. Harry wasn't a vodka drinker but he had some scotch and that was good enough. I took the lid off both bottles and empties about 15 pills into my hand before putting them in my mouth and washing them down with scotch. Then I just repeated the motion until the bottle was empty. Tears filled my eyes as I finished the bottle of scotch and savoured my last moments.

(Tally's POV)

I couldn't find dad anywhere. I'd checked his office, resus, cubicles...he was nowhere to be found. That left two other doctors that were on duty...Lara and Simon. Megan hated them both, I decided to keep searching for dad, Megan would disown me if I took either of those two. I found dad in the staffroom.

"Dad?"

He turned. "Tally what's wrong?"

"I think Megan's going to do something stupid" I told him

"What makes you think that? He asked

"Just something she said. She was talking about going to stay with her dad..."

"What? Patrick?" he asked and I nodded in response.

"Okay lets go and check on her" dad agreed

It didn't take us long to get home and I was afraid of what we were going to find. I was right to worry. The first thing I saw was the blonde hair on the floor, then as we walked around the cupboards I saw the empty bottle of scotch and the pills. Dad wouldn't let me see anything else and told me to call an ambulance. That's when I realised it was bad.

It seemed to take forever for Comfort and Fin to reach us and in the time dad was trying to resuscitate her. The colour had drained from her face and the area around her mouth and eyes was grey. When we reached the hospital I wasn't allowed to stay with Megan so I decided to make them see what they'd done. I found them both in the staffroom carrying on as if nothing had happened.

"You don't care do you!?" I asked furious

"Excuse me?" Lara asked

"Megan's in resus fighting for her life because she took an overdose because YOU don't want her!"

"What?"

"You heard" I shook my head "You disgust me" I walked off.

(Harry's POV)

Lara and I were collegues and close friends but I did not support her relationship with Simon. She had not played it the right way and pushing Megan away for Simon Kaminski...It was a disgrace. Megan lived with me but I had no idea how she was feeling. I knew she was angry and upset but I didn't know how depreased she was. I needed to know what she'd taken.

"Megan I need to know what you've taken?" I asked her

She was unresponsive.

"Okay start her on 300Mg of narchem" I said

Lara came barging in. "Is it true?" she asked

Then she spotted Megan lying there. "Oh god"


	3. Chapter 3

(Lara's POV)

"You can't be in here" Harry said "You know the protocol"

"Oh to hell with the protocols! That's my daughter"

"Now you decide to care!" Tally said

"Don't you dare tell me how to look after my daughter" I argued

"That's just it. You haven't been looking after her at all!"

"Enough!" Harry warned "Both of you outside now"

Harry escorted us both outside of the resus area. Had I really been that bad? I know I hadn't handled things very well but I hadn't neglected Megan had I? Simon made me feel young again. He made me feel loved but that didn't mean I didn't care about my daughter. Simon didn't get on with Megan and she'd chosen to move out, I hadn't forced her…

"Why don't you just go back to Simon and we'll look after Megan like we have done for the last 6 months" Tally said

(Megan's POV)

I felt strange, like I was floating. I kept drifting between reality and the dream world. In the dream world I was free and happy; in reality I was drowsy and weak.

"Megan? Megan can you hear me?" Harry said

"Tally…" I groaned

"Tally's right outside. I need you to tell me what you've taken?"

"I…can't remember"

I knew exactly what I'd taken, 70 paracetamol capsules, 30 aspirin and some antibiotic that I couldn't pronounce.

"Do you understand what will happen if you don't tell me?" he asked

"I'll die..."

"yes. You will"

"Good. Then maybe I won't be such a burden" I croaked

(Lara's POV)

Harry came out to me, a grim look on his face.

"You need to find out what she's taken" he said

I went into resus, walking over and she took a glance in my direction before turning away.

"Get…out" she said quietly

"Okay, you feel like I haven't been there for you? Well I'm here it's just you and me. So talk to me?"

"It's too late"

"It's not. We can work through this together" I tried to talk her round

"It's…too…late. I wish it was you and I know that sounds really bad but that's how I feel"

"You wish what was me?" I questioned

"I wish dad was here and you were dead"

"Okay I guess I deserved that…"

"Just go please"

"No. I'm not going to let you die, if you still hate me when all this is over then you never have to see me again. But I will not let you die"

(Megan's POV)

Tally and Harry were outside peering in through the glass. Tally's face was broken…so broken and I felt terrible for what I was doing to her. She was my best friend and she'd been there for me through everything. I motioned for them to come in.

"I want a minute with Tally" I croaked

Harry took Lara out and Tally sat down.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked

I didn't say anything.

"Oh come on! This is me. I'm your best friend!" Tally said starting to get upset

"It's the only way"

"No it's not! When mum died, I hated dad I blamed him for the whole thing. But we got through it and you have me. If you want we can just get away just the two of us. We don't need parents, but you're my best friend I need you" Tally said

Tears brimmed my eyes threatening to spill over and my body was overcome with guilt.

"My jacket pocket"

That was were I'd hidden the labels. Tally found them and took them back to her dad who then started to set up a drip and try and save my life. All I could do was watch; Tally had convinced me that I couldn't leave her alone. When I was moved upstairs to the ward, Tally would stay up with me telling me her plans. We were going to get away from holby. Go to college, university and live our dreams. My life no longer revolved around Lara Stone.

When I got out of hospital, Tally and I found an apartment in London near a good college. I took my A levels there and then I went on to study at oxford.


	4. Chapter 4

_**_5 Years Later_**_

(Megan's POV)

I was driving down the motorway in my silver BMW X5; I had my iPhone connected to the hands free system in case I got any important calls. I had a job interview for a registrar's post. I'd been an SHO for a year or 2 now. I hadn't really kept an eye on time. My phone began to ring and I unlocked it to see the name.

_**Tally calling...**_

I pressed accept.

"Hey Megs where are you?" she asked

"I'm driving up to Holby I told you I have an interview"

"Oh yeah. Are you sure about this I mean Holby..."

"Tal, it's been 5 years I doubt she's there" I explained

"Okay then, just wondered when you'll be home?"

"Probably sometime tomorrow"

"Alright. Good luck!" she said

"Thanks Tal"

"Say hi to Bex and dad for me?" she asked

"Of course I'll see you later"

"Bye"

I hung up. The traffic ahead of me was coming to a halt. I pulled over onto the hard shoulder and got out of the car to see what was going on there was a crash 3 casualties and no emergency services on scene although I was informed they'd been called. I ran back to the car, opening the back door grabbing my emergency backpack. It was a large green thing and contained most things I needed. Oxygen, chest drain kit, morphine, my stethoscope, bandages, dressings etc.

The first car was a red mini cooper and the other was silver, a Toyota Celica. In the mini cooper was an old couple in there late 60's and in the Toyota was a boy in his late teens. I took care of the old couple first.

"Hi I'm Dr Spiller, can you tell me your name?" I asked her

"Reenie" she replied "Spiller. I've heard that name before. A man...your father?"

I nodded.

"He was a lovely man. So nice" Reenie said

"Have you got any pain anywhere Reenie?"

"Just my back dear"

I slid an oxygen mask on her and put a collar on her too. I did the same with her husband too.

"Okay, I need to go and see the man in the other car. I'll be back soon" I smiled "Just stay calm and take some deep breathes"

I grabbed my bag and ran back over to the other car.

"Hi I'm Dr Megan Spiller, what's your name handsome?" I asked the man

"Jake" He groaned

"Okay Jake, where's the pain?"

"My leg...it's stuck and my arm"

"Okay, any neck pain? Back pain?"

"No"

"Okay I'm going to put a neck collar on you just in case and I'm going to give you some morphine for the pain. Scared of needles?" I asked

"Nope" He groaned again

I fitted a collar on his and gave him some morphine. His leg was in a bad way and I wasn't sure if it could be saved. But it was my job to keep him calm and distracted.

"How old are you Jake?"

"20"

"Girlfriend?" I asked

"No single. What about you? Married?" he asked back

"Ha-ha noooo" I replied

"Well maybe when I get out of here you'll let me take you out?"

"Okay it's a deal"

He smiled; I heard the sirens approaching us.

"I need to go brief the paramedics. Don't go anywhere?" I told him

"No chance"

I ran over to the approaching ambulance. It was Nikki and Luke.

"Well well Megan Stone as I live and breathe"

"Luke Warren and its Spiller actually"

He pulled me into a hug. Luke pulled my ID off my trousers.

"Dr Spiller?" he asked

"You bet paramedic boy" I grinned

Nikki handed me a high vis doctor jacket and a helmet.

"Thanks Nik. Right we have an old couple in the mini, the woman is complaining of neck pain, the man seems fine but I don't want to take any risks. Young lad in the Toyota, query broken arm. Legs trapped so waiting on the fire crew. As soon as we get him out his BP is going to drop like a lead balloon and he's going to crash" I informed them

Once we got the old couple out of the car and off the hospital with Fin and Comfort we had the task of getting Jake out. I sat in the car with him under the protective blanket while they cut the roof off.

"I can think of better situations I'd rather be in that involve you and a blanket" Jake joked

I laughed "Keep dreaming honey"

Once we got Jake out he was laid out on a spinal board on the road. His BP was already falling; Nikki tried to postpone the bleed in his leg while I performed CPR. We got him back; I knew I had to go in the ambulance with him. I threw Luke my keys so he could follow in the car. When we arrived at Holby, I helped unload Jake and Nikki and I rushed him through the doors. A new doctor rushed to us, someone I didn't recognise. An American guy.

"This is Jake Walker involved in an RTC, BP is 120/30, GCS is 6, and he wasn't KO'd. He's had oxygen and 300Mg's of morphine" I told him

"I've got it from here. Go an get cleaned up" Dr Brodie told me

I checked my watch. I'd missed my interview this was the closest I'd ever get to working here. I went up to Harry's office to try and explain.


	5. Chapter 5

(Megan's POV)

I stood outside resus watching through the glass, I didn't actually work here so I couldn't help. I'd been in the profession long enough to be able to tell what was happening from a distance. Jake was crashing, he'd been down about 15 minutes now, they stopped for a minute. It was what they did; it was like a last minute chance to see if his heart would start after some help. Jim shook his head and one of the nurses switched off the monitor. I couldn't believe it. It was the worst feeling in the world, I felt like I'd failed. Like I hadn't done the job I was trained to do. I hadn't saved him. He was gone.

"First one is always the hardest"

I turned to see Harry stood behind me.

"How did you know he was the first?" I questioned

"Could tell from the look on your face. Come on..." he put his hand in the center of my back, steering me away from the sight of my first death. He took me up to his office after I changed my top.

"I guess I kind of missed my interview..."

"Yes. But saving lives is something we value here" Harry said "And its a good reason for missing your interview"

"I didn't save him..." I said

"Megan, there are going to be patients you can't save but you tried your best and I know you'll make a great registrar here..."

"Wait what?" I questioned

"I'm giving you the job"

"But the interview..."

"You just did it out there in the road" He explained

"Oh thanks"

"Welcome back to Holby Dr Spiller. Take as long as you need to get settled back into Holby and let me know when you can start"

I stood up and hugged him softly.

"Thank you Harry" I smiled

"I'd quite like it if you and Tally moved back in with me just until you get settled"

"I'll see what Tally says." I smiled "How's Lara?"

"She went home"

"What to her flat?"

"No...to Melbourne" he said

"why?"

"On the morning of their wedding Simon slept with someone else. She was distraught, maybe you two should try and make amends?"

(Lara's POV)

I'd been laid on the beach most of the day. I loved spending time with my mum and I loved the hot weather but I missed my hectic life and now all the busy days were gone all I was left with was time. And although time was a great healer I had a lot of it and that meant all I did was think about all the bad things. How I'd lost Patrick the only man that I'd ever truly loved…How I'd messed up with Megan and how I'd let the likes of Simon Kaminski into my heart knowing what he was like and believing I could change him…

I'd thrown everything I had away and then when things got tough, I ran away. I'd never get that time back with Megan. She was 21 years old and I hadn't seen or heard from her in five years. What sort of mother did that make me? Patrick would be turning in his grave. She was the only part of him I had left. But, I didn't know if it was too late to fix things…

I went home and showered, I was covered in a mixture of sand and salt water. I wrapped myself in a dressing gown and sat on my bed picking up the phone of the bedside table. The international ringtone seemed to last forever until someone finally picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi Harry" I replied

"Lara…How are you?" he asked, sounding surprised to see me

"I'm okay. If I was to come back to Holby would my SHO post still be open?" I asked

"Of course I told you it would be"

"In that case I think I'm ready"

"Really?" He asked

"Yes. I have some bridges to build"

(Luke's POV)

It was no secret to Harry that I held a bit of a torch light for Megan and after last night I totally saw why. Megan and I had gone out for a drink last night to celebrate her getting the job, only one had turned to two…two had turned to three…and so on. Then we'd played a little game of doctor's and paramedic's and now to cut a long story shorter she was laid in my arms…in my bed…


	6. Chapter 6

_**_3 week's later_**_

(Megan's POV)

It was my second week on the job and Luke and I had already sort of become an item. He was lovely and he made me happy. Tally on the other hand wasn't so bothered about moving back to Holby and decided to stay down in London, she had said she'd come and visit but she was going to go back to uni and study something else. I laid in bed snuggled into Luke's side; I stared at the ceiling deep in thought.

"What you thinking about?" Luke asked

"Lara's back today..."

"Baby, you don't have to speak to her if you don't want to" Luke told me

"I know. It's just been a long time and I kind of feel like I owe her, you know?"

"Well you know I'm here whatever you decide"

"I know. Thank you baby" I smiled kissing him softly.

I dragged myself out of bed and away from Luke's arms, unwillingly and climbed in the shower. I wished I could lay in bed with Luke forever and just stay in his arms, where I felt safe and loved and wanted. No matter what I did I was freezing and I couldn't seem to get warm. It was Luke's turn to drive and once I got in the car, I turned the heating on full power. It didn't take long for us to get to the hospital because we didn't live that far away, Luke took my hand and we headed inside.

I decided to stick to cubicles, it was warmer there because the doors weren't swinging backwards and forwards bringing in the cold draft. My first patient was an elderly man with an abscess on his leg; I opened the curtain and went inside taking a look at his notes.

"Right Mr Moore, lets have a look at this leg" I smiled, pulling on some gloves

I examined the abscess.

"Okay Mr Moore that abscess needs to be drained so I'll get that sorted and we'll sort you out some antibiotics and then you can go home" I smiled

"Thank you love" he said

I left the cubicle and got the set to drain the abscess, I took it back into the cubicle and closed the curtain pulling on a fresh set of gloves and getting to work. Once the abscess was drained, I dressed it and took the stuff away and wrote up a prescription for him and discharging him.

The next patient on my list was a young girl about 7 years old with a burn on her arm, she'd knocked a coffee over onto herself.

"Hi sweetheart, what's your name?" I asked

"Megan" she said

"Really? That's my name too" I smiled "Can I have a little look at your arm so we can make it better?"

She nodded and held out her arm. I examined it.

"It looks like its just superficial burns nothing too extensive" I told her mum, then I turned to the girl "I'm going to put some magic bandages on your arm which are going to make it feel better okay?"

The little girl smiled "Okay" she said

I placed gel pads on her arm.

"Right I need you to keep those there for a bit and I'll come back in a little while to see you" I smiled

I went out to reception to find my next patient, but it was fairly quiet tonight and there was no one waiting. Someone snuck up behind me and scared the life out of me; I turned around to hit them and yell only to see Luke. As soon as I saw that face my anger turned to love and I wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him softly.

"Megan! Need you in resus!" Harry called

I hated pulling myself away from Luke, but I did so reluctantly after giving him one last kiss and running off.

"Love you" I called behind me and I heard a faint reply.

(Luke's POV)

I'd been on with Fin all day and we were due a break so I went to get us some coffees. Seeing Megan on the way had been a definite bonus and she'd definitely brightened up my day. Damn she was so sexy when she went rushing off. She looked exactly like Lara but without the Aussie accent. She gave me the same look Lara did when she wasn't impressed and it was cute. I finally got back to the ambulance with the coffees when a voice came through on the radio.

"Holby control to 3006, young child with a head injury at Forest Hill School"

I sighed. We never seemed to get a break anymore. We chucked the coffees away and I picked up the radio.

"3006 all received and mobile"


	7. Chapter 7

(Megan's POV)

When I came out of resus my head was spinning. The man I'd just treated had a severed femoral artery and although we'd managed to stop the blood loss and get his BP back up, he wasn't out of the woods yet. Blood didn't normally bother me and this was the first time this had happened to me in my entire career.

I leaned against the wall trying to regain some of my balance, everything around me had just merged into one big blur and I couldn't tell which direction I was walking or where I was. It was awful, I felt so disorientated. Then my vision disappeared all together and all I could see was black. The next person that came out of resus, I grabbed them. I could only pray it was a nurse or a doctor and not a relative.

"Megan?" Lara said

I could only just make out her voice, I didn't know what to say and I didn't have chance to think of anything before everything went including my hearing and my knees buckled beneath me, sending my body hurtling towards the ground.

(Lara's POV)

I caught Megan before she fell to the floor; she'd just gone all funny. She'd been fine in resus.

"Can I get some help over here!?" I yelled

Harry came running out of resus and picked Megan up in his arms, taking her through to cubicles.

"What happened?" Harry asked as he put a mask on her

"She grabbed me and then her knees just buckled"

"She probably just fainted. Lets do blood glucose, F,B,C's,U's and E's just to make sure" Harry said

Dillon took care of the blood samples while I sat with her.

"Come and get me as soon as she comes round" Harry said before leaving

I couldn't believe my little girl was a registrar, Patrick would be so proud of her, following in his footsteps. I couldn't believe he was missing all this. I'd seen her with Luke earlier, I was glad she had him. He seemed to make her happy. Megan stirred and her eyes fluttered open, it took her a few seconds to realise where she was and she sat up.

"Take it easy" I warned her

"I'm fine" she told me

"I'm going to go and let Harry know you're awake"

(Megan's POV)

As soon as she left I got off the bed and grabbed my stethoscope, we had real ill people that needed treating. I walked out to reception and approached Bex.

"Megan are you okay?" she asked

"Yeah I'm fine, who's next?"

Bex handed me the notes.

"Umm Charlotte Hunter?" I called

A young girl came towards me, I smiled at her. She looked scared. I led her through to cubicles and closed the curtain.

"I see you've hurt your arm?" I asked

She nodded. "I fell off my bike, it really hurts"

I examined it being careful not to cause her any more pain, I suspected it was broken. There was a lot of swelling though so it was hard to tell.

"I think you've broken it, so I'll give you something for the pain and then we'll get you up to x-ray and see what's going on okay?" I smiled

She nodded and I left the cubicle to go and book her in for an x-ray.

"Megan?" Harry collared me just as I left reception.

I sighed and turned slowly. "Yes?"

"Lara asked you to wait until I'd seen you..." He stated

"I'm fine" I told him

"Even so you should have waited to be given the all clear"

"I gave myself the all clear"

"Megan...Your body is telling you to stop. You need to listen" He said

"I'm alright. I skipped lunch that's all"

"Well I'm waiting for your blood results to come back. I don't want you working until I've seen them so go and get a coffee or something..."

"I don't need blood tests and I don't need coffee. I have patients to see" I insisted

"Megan it wasn't a request"

I sighed and finally gave in reluctantly, I handed Harry the notes for my patients and walked off to the staffroom. I sat down on the sofa with a coffee and although I hated to admit it, it felt like a much needed break.


	8. Chapter 8

(Harry's POV)

It took me a while to chase up Megan's blood results. They showed Megan had a very low blood sugar but they showed something else as well. I just hoped Megan had stayed in the staffroom and listened to me. I found Megan sat at the counter reading a medical book. I approached her slowly.

"So what's your diagnosis _doc_?" She asked not looking up from her book

"Your blood sugar is very low"

I placed a bottle of lucozade and a chocolate bar on the counter.

"Okay...Anything else?" she said still staring at the pages

"Yes actually, you're pregnant"

She laughed. "That's a good one. Who put you up to it? Luke? Fin? Lara?"

"No one" I handed her the results and her laughter stopped abruptly as she saw.

She was on her feet and out the door before I could blink. I followed her to a cubicle where she stood with a Doppler machine, trying to make sense of it all. The sound of a heartbeat filled the room and the colour drained from her face.

"But...but..."

She sat down on the bed, she didn't speak for a bit and when the colour returned to her face. She looked at me.

"I'm pregnant..." She said as though she was trying to process it.

"I know it's a shock, why don't you take the rest of the day off? Go and speak to Luke?"

(Luke's POV)

Megan came walking out of the main entrance, we'd just unloaded a patient and Fin had taken him inside.

"Hey you got a minute?" She asked

"Yeah course" I looked questionably at the chocolate and lucozade in her hand

"Low blood sugar..." she said "I have something to tell you"

"You're pregnant?" I asked

"How did you know?"

"It's just what happens in the movies you know when the girl says she has something to tell the guy-wait you're actually pregnant?" I asked

"Yeah..."

I didn't know what to say.

"Okay" I finally managed

"Is that it? You're supposed to faint or scream or cry or something..." she told me

I pulled her close; her body was so straight and rigid. "Its okay" I said "Whatever you want to do we'll do it together" she relaxed in my arms.

"Interrupting something am I?" Fin asked

Megan pulled away.

"No, I was just telling Luke something" She kissed me softly "See you at home"

She walked back into the hospital.

"So what's going on?" Fin asked

"I'm going to be a dad man" I grinned

"Congrats man you deserve it" Fin grinned back as he high-fived me

(Megan's POV)

I guessed it was time to sort my life out, if I had any hope of raising a child I had to sort my own life out first. I found Lara at reception.

"Megan, how are you feeling?" She asked

"Good, when do you finish?" I asked

"10 minutes" she said "why?"

"Do you want to go for a coffee? Or something?"

"Okay"

"I'll meet you in the staffroom"

I made my way to that staffroom, I had to admit this chocolate was actually really making me feel better but I doubted it had anything to do with the low blood sugar. Lara soon followed and I rushed into her arms, I know I shouldn't have but I just really needed a hug from her and I hadn't had one in so long. I looked over her shoulder to see Harry smiling through the glass. I should have known he'd be happy about this.

"Hey, what's brought this on?"She asked

"Just needed it" I relied

"Let's go for that coffee and you can tell me all about it?" she smiled grabbing her bag and coat

We ended up back at mine and Luke's house, sat on the couch.

(Luke's POV)

I'd been working late and at midnight I was just about home. I parked on the drive and went inside. I knew Megan would be asleep so I crept in expecting to find her curled up in bed, but as I walked into the living room. Megan was asleep in Lara's arms. It was a sight I never thought I'd see again. I placed a blanket over them and went to bed.


	9. Chapter 9

(Luke's POV)

I woke up in the morning to the sound of vomiting; it wasn't something I expected to hear until I got to work. The toilet flushed and Megan came out of the en suite. She saw me awake and I held out my arms, so she could curl into them.

"Morning" she grumbled

"How are you feeling?" I asked

Her groan answered my question.

"That bad huh?" I asked "Where's Lara?"

"She went home to change before work. What are we going to do Luke?" she asked looking up at me

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't know... do you want a baby paramedic running around?" I asked

"I wouldn't have a problem with it"

"Really?

"No. I think it might be pretty cool"

That seemed to put her mind at ease and she melted into me.

"Do you have to work today?" she grumbled

"You bet I do, I'm shadowing the hot, new registrar"

"How come?" I asked

"Josh thought it would be good experience"

(Megan's POV)

I felt a little better knowing I'd have Luke all day. The sickness was subsiding now and I was beginning to feel like my normal self. I'd barely put my stuff in my locker when we had a shout.

"What have we got?" I asked

"This is Adam; fell off the roof suspected broken leg, arm and ribs. He also has a laceration to his face. GCS was 140 throughout; BP is 120/30, Pulse 120. Everybody got a piece?" Comfort asked

"Yep" I said and we pulled him across "Hi Adam, I'm Dr Spiller" I smiled

I pulled on some gloves and looked at the head wound.

"That cut is pretty deep so it's going to need a couple of stitches and then we'll get you up to x-ray" I smiled

"Luke can you get me a suture kit please?" I asked

He stood there for a second just staring at me.

"Luke?"

"Sorry what?" He asked

"Suture kit"

Once I got him stitched up and x-rayed I sent him up to plaster.

(Luke's POV)

When Megan was finally free, I caught her in the middle of cubicles. I'd been planning this for a few days but finding the right time had proven difficult. But stood here with everyone seemed perfect.

"Excuse me! Can I have everyone's attention please?"

"Luke. What are you doing?" Megan asked

As soon as I had everyone's attention, I pulled out the ring.

"As everyone knows, I love this doctor here a lot...So much in fact that we're having a baby...I know that and she knows that" I said looking at her, then I dropped to one knee

"But just to make sure everyone else knows that I want to spend the rest of my life with her..." I opened the box "Megan will you marry me? And spend the rest of your life with this cocky paramedic?" I grinned

She stood there for a while, a look of shock on her face. Then she glanced at everyone around her, watching. Smiling.

"Megan?" I asked, starting to feel like a bit of an idiot by now.

"I'm sorry..." she whispered before running out.

Rejection ran through me like ice. I felt like such an idiot, how could I have gotten it so wrong? I guess she didn't feel the same. Fin put his hand on my shoulder as I stood up.

"I'm sorry man" he said

(Megan's POV)

I felt awful for embarrassing Luke like that. It was just all too fast. I didn't want to rush into everything and then have it all go wrong. I mean with the baby and Luke and I had been great as we were, I didn't want a wedding to ruin that. I wanted to marry him...one day, just not right now. Now I sat in the staffroom slumped against my locker, sobbing. I was overcome with guilt and anger, but I was angry at myself for hurting Luke. I'd seen the happiness fade from his eyes when I'd turned him down. I didn't deserve him...How could I have done that? By the time I'd pulled myself together my shift was over.

I had a scan booked afterwards and after my little outburst with Luke it looked like I was going alone, I had told Luke last week but I knew he'd never remember and I couldn't face him too remind him. I wasn't even sure if I was going myself. It took me a while too come to a decision and that decision was go home, have a bath and eat ice-cream. I grabbed my bag and walked out to my car, I pulled out of my space only to slam on the brakes, to stop myself going flying into another car.


	10. Chapter 10

(Megan's POV)

I climbed out of the car, ready to tear someone's head off and yell about how they should look where they were going. But, it didn't quite play out the way I was expecting. In my haste to go home I'd forgotten to take my ID badge off. A man climbed out of the other car, my ID seemed to catch his eye. He showed me the gun in his belt.

"You're a doctor. Help him or I'll use it" He said

He shoved me in the direction of the back of the car. If only I'd gone to that scan instead of home, I wouldn't be here now. The man in the back of the car was in a bad way; I took him into Paediatric resus and closed the blinds.

"Megan need a hand?" Harry asked on the way in

"No." I said firmly

Harry seemed to take me seriously and left it at that. The man had a gunshot wound and the bullet was really close to causing some damage, it needed to be removed.

"He needs to go to theatre" I told the gun man

"No. You do it. Here." He ordered

"I can't, I don't have the surgical equipment" I told him

He pulled the gun out of his belt and held it up. "Do it!" he barked

"Okay...Okay"

Harry came in. "Megan are you sure you-"

Harry's eyes widened as he took in the man with the gun in my face. He came in a closed the door behind him.

"Okay lets just try and stay calm here" Harry said

"Shut up!" The gun man barked, swinging the gun round to point it at Harry.

"No!" I yelled and the man looked at me "I need him. To help me" I quickly said trying to stop him shooting Harry.

Harry led the procedure while I assisted.

(Lara's POV)

My phone rung but when I answered it, it was like there was nobody there I could just hear a conversation. Megan had probably sat on her phone or something.

"Look just put the gun down please, this is a paediatric resuscitation unit there's a lot of delicate equipment in here" Megan said

She was brilliant.

"Dillon call the police, there's a gun in paeds resus" I told him as quietly as I could before rushing off

As soon as the police arrived they cordoned the area off, we weren't admitting any more patients and the police wouldn't let anyone in.

"Listen that's my girlfriend in there, she's pregnant!" Luke argued with the policeman

"I'm sorry sir but we can't let anyone else in"

(Harry's POV)

I'd never seen such fear on Megan's face. She was trying so hard to stay calm. We just had to hope someone would find us. Help us. The monitor began to beep.

"We're losing him" Megan said

The man never really stood a chance anyway, there was too much damage caused by the gunshot. I had to get Megan out of here. She was 21, pregnant, Tally's best friend, Lara's daughter...

I didn't really have time to think of a plan before Luke came crashing through the door, he threw himself at the gunman wrestling with the gun. Megan and I ducked behind the trolley trying to find some cover. The gun went of and Megan's face broke. We didn't know what was happening. Just the sound of something skidding and then the police piled in.

"Get down on the ground!"

(Luke's POV)

We all got down on the ground and once the gunman was arrested we were allowed to get up. Harry and Megan both had to go for a once over, but like the stubborn pair they were they both refused. The first thing Megan did was hug me, she held me tightly before pulling away and smacking my shoulder.

"You idiot!" she said

Talk about mixed signals... Lara came in after that and claimed Megan in her arms. I looked at my watch.

"We could still make the scan" I told her.

"Not today, I just need some time...alone" she said "I'll book another scan"

I kissed her cheek and went home. The place seemed empty, I wasn't use to being here alone. I started tidying up, Megan always moaned that I never cleaned up after myself. I sat down on our bed, holding the ring. This was not how I saw today playing out...

(Megan's POV)

It had just gone 1am and I was still at work, it was quiet but in times of hurt and stress and crisis this was what I did. Work. I guess I was like Lara in that way. I wasn't ready to go home and face Luke just yet and Harry and Lara had both left for the night so there was no one to tell me I couldn't be here. I just felt so guilty, the thing was Luke didn't seem to mind which only made me feel even worse. Harry took over from Jim the next morning.

"Megan what are you still doing here?" He asked

"Catching up. Have you seen the backlog?" I asked

"Go home" he said "Get some sleep"

"I'm fine"

"Megan" Harry said

"Okay. Okay"


	11. Chapter 11

(Megan's POV)

I got home to find Luke sat watching the football in the living room. I walked straight past him going to the bathroom and running myself a nice hot bath, I laid in there for ages and Luke knocked before coming in.

"Can we talk?" He asked

"Not right now. No" I replied

"Megan you said no okay? It's not the end of the world, but we're having a baby"

"Are we?" I asked

"What's that supposed to mean?" He asked

"You know what it means!" I yelled

"So because I ask you to marry me you change your mind about everything?"

"Just leave it!" I screamed

"No!"Luke yelled "This is my baby too"

I climbed out the bath and pulled on my dressing gown.

"I don't need this" I said walking out of the bathroom

(Luke's POV)

"Megan?" I called behind her

She spun on her heels and threw the closest thing to hand at me. It happened to be a perfume bottle, I flung my arms out to protect myself and a piece of glass stabbed into it. I groaned in pain. As soon as she realised what she'd done, she was sorry. I could see it in her eyes.

"Luke you know I didn't mean it? I didn't mean any of it" Megan said

She ran back into the bedroom, I left her alone to calm down. I was due at work in a bit and my arm looked like it'd need stitches. Lara was available thankfully.

"What happened?" Lara asked as she was cleaning it.

"Megan and I got into a fight and she threw perfume at me" I explained

"Ah"

She finished up and I went home determined to sort things out with Megan, but I got home to find all her stuff and her car gone. There was a note though...

'_**I'm so sorry. I never meant any of it, I swear. I'm going home, I don't deserve you. I love you'**_

**7 months later**

(Megan's POV)

It had been 7 months since Luke and I split and I missed him still. Tally wanted me to go back to Holby this weekend, she was on a break from uni and she was going to visit her dad, she thought I should go see Lara too and I guessed I should. We were nearly at Holby when I felt a twinge but it was just the one so I passed it off as nothing. I got out at the hospital and bumped straight into Luke.

"Luke" I said

"Megan" He replied "How are you?"

"Good. Thanks for the baby paramedic suit, it was really cute" I smiled

"I'm glad you got it"

"Come on" Tally said coming towards me

"I'll erm see you later then" I said

"Uh yeah"

I turned to go inside, when I felt another twinge. It was sharper and more intense. It made me stop dead in my tracks.

"You okay?" Tally asked

"I don't know" I answered truthfully

Then a load of fluid splashed around my ankles and I felt another twinge. I winced. That answered that question. Luke grabbed a wheelchair and sat me in it.

"Tally go and get Lara!" Luke said, I could tell he was panicking

(Luke's POV)

Oh god! What did I do? I was going to be a dad. Crap. I wasn't ready yet. I rushed Megan into paeds resus because it was empty, picking up Lara, Harry and Tally on the way. Things were moving quite fast. Lara was so calm and collected but I was a mess.

"Just hold her hand" Lara said, chuckling at the look on my face.

I did as she said; Megan laid back sweat laced across her face. I stroked her hair trying to soothe her in some way.

"Megan? I need you to push?" Lara said

Tally and I had a hand each and Lara and Harry were doing the doctor stuff. Megan put all her energy into pushing and she screamed out as she did.

"Good girl. Again" Lara encouraged

Megan squeezed my hand really tight as she gave another push. She clutched it so tight I thought it would snap off.

"Come on baby" I encouraged and she did so again

After one last push, Megan relaxed and the room was filled with crying.

"You've got a son" Lara smiled at me


End file.
